Giving, Taking, and Finding a Balance

Ever since a young age, I have been waiting for the day I could live on my own. I loved the idea of being independent and making  my own decisions. I could choose when I wanted to sleep, how I wanted to decorated, who I wanted to have over, and most of all, I could prove to others that I could really live on my own. And since at least the 4th grade, Gracie and I already talked about living together in college. For years, we dreamed about the possibility of dorming together, getting our own place, and making it our abode. We always saw it with just the two of us, furnishing, decorating, cleaning, organizing, cooking, and baking together. As we applied for schools senior year of high school, we both applied to the University of Washington. Frankly, it was not the first choice for either of us when we first began applications. We both applied to different out of state schools and because of various reasons regarded tuition costs and other factors, we both ended up attending UW. We applied to live together and moved into our new place ready to turn our dreams and expectations into reality. Through all the years of planning to live together, it had always been the two of us. We forgot to account the possibility of being assigned other roommates. As life would have it, we were assigned into a quad with two other girls.

Since day 1 of moving out, things were already challenging. I had to learn to different social standards or family standards. I had to learn that not everyone’s living habits were the same as my family. I admit, I was and can still be very myopic but I am learning to be more open to learning. Tension in our apartment ran high and it felt like a war zone between two countries. There were days no one wanted to go home because things were so bad but there is good work in progress.  We’re all learning to more accepting and figuring out where the balance of merging four different lifestyles together lies. Sometimes in life, you have to pick your battles and let some things go. Maybe the accidental use of a spoon isn’t something that needs to result in a full on cat fight. Maybe it’s okay to wipe up that water in the bathroom without turning it into a big deal. Perhaps she didn’t actually purposefully leave her books on your bed to spite you. Everyday is a new opportunity to learn and to grow. When you are finally able to come down from your small, narrow-minded, pompous, and self-righteous seat, you discover so many more possibilities of friendship. Maybe we’re not best friends who are inseparable but we’re laughing together, making tea for one another, and encouraging each other.  That’s a start.  You can’t get anywhere without a start.

Move-in day!

After talking about living together for 9 years, it’s finally happened!


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